We all are so familiar and terrified of all those aunties who visits our home and ask us about all those things we just don’t want to talk about. We usually lock ourselves in our room but sometimes when we are low on our good luck and high on our bad luck, we have to face this encounter. A few days ago, I faced this and the interesting thing is the answers I had in my mind for each one of hers question.
Aunty: Hello beta, how are your studies going on?
Me: Hello aunty, yeah they are going on well I guess, my semester exams are round the corner, so yes its going on pretty well. Thanks for asking.
My mind: Yeah, I have my exams from next week and I have not even opened a book. Every time I open my laptop the first thing I do is open facebook, see nothing , logout , stream youtube videos , then again open facebook , again nothing , again logout, back to youtube again and this program is on an infinite loop with a condition if its late hours or there is no one at home then some ‘other’ websites replace youtube in the infinite loop. So my studies are not just going on well but GHANTA well.
Aunty: You are doing Engineering right? I have heard its very hard. You must be a very hard working student.
Me: Yes, its hard. But when it’s something you like doing, then its easier to do. Plus, the college lectures are too tiring. One has to concentrate for like 6-8 hours on the things our professors teach. Its important. Engineering is tough.
My mind: Yeah, its tough. Sitting in lectures for so many hours doing absolutely nothing is tough. Its hard not to fall asleep. The only thing that save our lives is the phone, specially the smart ones. Angry birds, temple run, subway surfers and a lot more are life savers. God bless their developers and the guy who invented smartphones. The last lecture of the day is the toughest and very weird also. Once my friend sitting right next to me started humming ‘saare jahaan se achha, Hindustan hamara…..’, and we looked at him and gave him a ‘WTF?’ expression and then joined him in the next minute.(Yes, it was our beloved BAWA).Sometimes it gets so dark and I go deep into the thoughts, Just like 2 days back I made a ‘shayari’, it goes like
‘ Iss dil ka kya dosh tha jo tum chale gaye,
saali attendance itni low to naa thi jo debar hi kar diye gaye’
(ok I won’t write shayari again).
You even watsapp your friend who sits right next to you in case the teacher is an a$$hole and threatens to cancel the attendance if he finds you talking.But you have to be sure that the professor thinks you are all ears to him and he is teaching very well, otherwise you won’t get the attendance and you know you attend a class only to get the attendance. I think there must be a law called ‘Right to attendance’. Every student who attends the class should be given attendance, irrespective of any other thing professor accuses the student to have been doing. These guys should be given punishment if they don’t give you the attendance. Punishment being give attendance to everyone for next 2-3 classes. After all, its your right. And when you are free, you sit with your friends doing absolutely nothing but talking about girls, MBA/MS plans, the new releases and how big an a$$hole the new professor is and ofcourse the frequent ‘ye ladki pataale, wo ladki pataale’. People say engineering is tough, a wise man once said
‘Engineering teaches you the art of being cool and do absolutely nothing even when you are being screwed’
that wise man was me ofcourse. Imagine a tough course like engineering and we study one night before the exam so its tougher and this shows that we are not just hard working but GHANTA hard working.
Aunty: You are in JAYPEE Noida right? have heard that your college is a good one. Good your future is set, my son is doing BBA from Amity, he is such a spoilt brat, I and his father are so worried about his future.
My mom: Arre not to worry, studies never ensure success, there are many people out there who don’t have big degrees but are still successful in their field.
Me: Hmm, you have Bill Gates and Steve Jobs.
My mind: Ok first I don’t understand why it’s a ‘good one’ (or maybe she was just being sarcastic). All my college is gonna do is give me a job of 3 lakh something per annum after 4 year degree. That too is nobody is sure of. People doing hotel management earn more than this nowadays. A few days back I was talking to an engineering pass out who is working in Chennai, when I asked him how is work? His reply was ‘GHANTA work, girls here have more baal (hair) on their body than I do. It sucks.’ Engineering now is no more than doing +2 and specially if you are in JAYPEE Noida with this blue uniform of yours, you definitely feel like doing +2. A relative of my friend once asked him ‘morning mein prayer bhi karte ho?’ It must have been so embarrassing. And aunty! What are you talking about? While I am sitting right there in my lecture singing ‘saare jahaan se achha’ for no reason, your ‘good for nothing’ son is having fun with 4 of his sexy as hell girlfriends in the GIP, Noida. And mom? What was that? You never said this ‘studies never ensure success’ thing to me.
Aunty: Chalo its good manoj, I disturbed you I guess. Continue with your studies. Complete your engineering with flying colours.
My mom: Ok, Go back and study.
My mom’s mind: GHANTA Study.
Me: Ok bye aunty.
My mind: Engineering Engineering GHANTA Engineering!
Manoj the blogger 